16 funny one-liners

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16 funny one-liners

Post by Doctor Inferno on 7th June 2008, 12:24 pm

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy and the tallest guy in the National Basketball Association is Chinese."
-Chris Rock

"A guy know's he's in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days."
-Tim Allen

"A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished."
-Zsa Zsa Gabor


"I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places."
-Henny Youngman

"You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish."
-Jerry Seinfeld

"A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it."
-Bob Hope

"I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair."
-Thom Sharp

"This is a strange country we live in. When it comes to electing a president, we get two choices. But when we have to select a Miss America, we get 50."
-Jay Leno

"I figure you have the same chance of winning lottery whether you play or not."
-Fran Lebowitz

"Give a man a fish and he has food for a day; teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him for the entire weekend."
-Zenna Schaffer

"It's not that I'm afraid to die; I just don't want to be there when it happens."
-Woddy Allen

"I have my standards. They may be low, but I have them."
-Bette Midler

"I've been on a calender, but I've never been on time."
-Marilyn Monroe

"If God meant us to be naked, he would have made our skin fit better."
-Maureen Murphy

"It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it."
-Sam Levenson

"If winning isn't everything why do they keep score?"
-Vince Lombardi


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Re: 16 funny one-liners

Post by TeReX on 11th June 2008, 11:13 am

i like this:

"I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair."

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Re: 16 funny one-liners

Post by Biglowz on 11th June 2008, 11:39 am

I liked

"A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished."

and

"It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it."

:victory:


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I can dream can't I?


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Re: 16 funny one-liners

Post by rattakua on 10th August 2008, 6:35 am

Nice i like the bald one


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Re: 16 funny one-liners

Post by lol on 23rd January 2009, 10:34 am

lol LOL Banner

lol
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Re: 16 funny one-liners

Post by Sir $wat on 24th January 2009, 2:21 am

gonna print them...



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